Trust, Optimism & Purpose (REPLICATOR Model) 

Long periods of anxiety or depression often leave people feeling detached from who they are and what they want. They end up either exhausted from meeting everyone else’s needs or withdrawn and lost from hiding away from life. In that state it becomes very hard to make decisions or take meaningful action, because the mind is constantly doubting, seeking reassurance and fearing failure.

This video offers practical ways to move in a different direction: trusting yourself, others and life a little more, while building a temporary sense of purpose that can carry you forward until a clearer one emerges.

The fearful stories the mind tells are just stories. Through new actions and the reactions that follow, you begin to notice that the world does not end if you say no, or yes, or I don’t know, or if you mess up. It is perfectly OK not to know what will happen next in any moment or in the future — how could you know? Your mind doesn’t know either. As you become less addicted to your thoughts, learn to stay calmer, and decide what you actually want, random events stop throwing you so easily. You keep your wits about you and make decisions that line up with your intentions. And if something doesn’t pan out well (which often happens, because we don’t have hindsight), you stop beating yourself up. You simply know you did the best you could in that moment. At least you tried.

I believe the Universe tends to favour people who try. Fortune favours the brave — it seems to be how life works. You are consciously becoming your own most positive cheerleader, learning to ignore the unconscious mind’s doubtful thoughts and the body’s resulting emotions.

For anyone struggling to find purpose or meaning, I offer a simple model you can borrow until a more personal one becomes clear.

At the most basic biological level, humans are replicators. Our evolutionary drive is to survive long enough to reproduce, raise children and pass on practical life skills so the species continues. At the other end of the spectrum sits a more expansive view: that we are expressions of the world and our purpose is to nurture and protect this planet while creating flourishing communities that live in harmony with nature and each other. Somewhere between those two poles will sit your own purpose — whatever it turns out to be.

Having a purpose (even a temporary one) is useful because it gives you a clear decision filter. In any moment you can ask: “Regardless of what my anxious mind and nervous body are doing, what action do I need to take right now that aligns with my purpose and keeps me on the trajectory of who I want to become?” The decision becomes simpler: is this action in line with my purpose? Yes or no.

You can borrow a temporary purpose specifically to extract yourself from the current stuck place. Once you are standing in a bit more neutrality and calm, you can explore what you truly want with clearer eyes.

If you have children, becoming the best replicator you can be means treating them as your best work — being the role model and teacher who programmes them for an unfearful, adventurous and trusting life rather than one filled with fear and pessimism. If you don’t have children, you can reparent yourself. Ask: “If I had a child who was acting exactly as I am right now, what sensible advice would I give them for their best life?” Then take that advice yourself. Checking the front door twenty times and worrying all day about it? You would tell the child: check it once, we have insurance, there is nothing to worry about. Stop giving the thoughts and feelings any meaning. Ignore them.

Even if your children are already grown, it is never too late. We did the best we could with what we knew at the time, based on how we ourselves had been conditioned. As we begin to know better, we can do better — and our children (and grandchildren) can see the change.

John Glanvill’s Replicator Model:

The word REPLICATOR itself turns out to be a useful mnemonic for the work we are doing:

• R – Reprogrammable. We are reprogrammable. That is a fact.
• E – Energy. Keep the emotional battery recharged by worrying less, sleeping enough and detaching from the mind’s stories. Discharge the atomic battery by revisiting and releasing trapped trauma.
• P – Placebo. It works. Get into the habit of consciously placebo-ing your unconscious mind and body.
• L – Love. If you cannot love yourself, it becomes hard to believe anyone else could. Love others the way they want to be loved, and stop endlessly looking for evidence that they love you.
• I – Intuition. As you move away from anxiety and closer to calm, an inner knowing begins to emerge. You can start to trust it more.
• C – Courage. Feeling vulnerable yet still taking action is the definition of courage, regardless of the outcome.
• A – Action. Become a person of action. Life presents far more opportunities when you do.
• T – Time. There is only now. Everything else is a virtual-reality story. Only what you do in this moment influences the future.
• O – Observer. You are not your mind; you are the observer of it.
• R – Repetition. The unconscious mind needs lots of repetition before it updates. Consciously knowing something is not the same as the unconscious having absorbed it.

We are deliberately shifting language and focus: from anxiety, OCD and depression toward calmness, acceptance, choice and “what is best for me in this moment?” From pessimism (“that won’t work”) to optimism (“let me try, then I’ll know”). We stop moaning, complaining and doing drama — because who wants to spend time with someone who does those things? We practise stating the positive in each moment rather than the negative, so the Reticular Activating System begins to recondition itself toward greater confidence. Gratitude instead of focus on what is disliked.

What you think about directly affects how you feel. Complaining makes you feel bad; kindness and constructive focus make you feel better — regardless of the “truth” of any situation.

You can look at success and meaning in two ways. If you strive for a particular definition of success, your life will have meaning. Or you can decide you are OK with life not needing a grand meaning, and simply do what you want. Be careful that the definition of success you are using is one you have chosen, not one that was programmed into you. For me, success is being happy and doing what I love.

The practical invitation is simple. Borrow a temporary purpose if you need one. Use it as a decision filter. Reparent yourself with the same calm, encouraging advice you would give a child. Practise the REPLICATOR principles. Shift from the old fearful stories toward trust, optimism and deliberate action. The world does not end when you try. And each time you try, you become a little more the person who can live with greater calm and steadiness.

The full video is inside the course.