Goal of video
In this video, we continue our mission towards becoming more trusting and optimistic about developing a new decision-making framework for our lives.
Anxiety’s (OCD’s) chief strategy is to create doubt in your mind and fear in your body (as what the mind conceives the body responds to).
It tricks you by unconsciously offering your conscious mind ‘duality stories’ which offer both positive and negative outcomes simultaneously, such as, it might work, but it may fail too, this duality response causes doubt, procrastination and the subsequent need for reassurance or avoidance.
To free yourself of this duality trap, which causes so much uncertainty, the Observer must become rooted in one single preference of outcome – though the outcome will always be unknowable (as it hasn’t happened yet).
So, this is where our belief systems come into play, they are the part of us that decides which option is more likely to be true based on the old stories/beliefs we have about ourselves.
As Henry Ford famously stated, “Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t – you’re right.”
So, as we build this new, non-dual decision-making framework, the starting point has to be, “What do you think happens when you die?”
Because either ‘poof’ it’s all gone, so what you do now is irrelevant (or an indulgent now experience) or does what you do in this life influence what comes in the next one?
It’s a big question!
But can you see how (if you can answer it) you have the starting point of a new belief system which is the antidote to the anxious mind’s duality stories?
The duality trap is conquered by you (the Observer) becoming rooted in a single preference of outcome (though the outcome will always be unknowable).
Therefore, our new (self-chosen) belief systems will guide our decision-making process (regardless of truth) or any unrequested scary egoistic unconscious thoughts to the contrary, which is why powerful beliefs and having clear intentions you desire are crucial to everything!
This video is part one of two (with the self investigation tools). The the mind map I use in this video can be downloaded below as a pdf in the notes under the video in Patreon.
Deciding what happens when you die allows you to choose how to live!
I’m John Glanvill, author of The Calmness in Mind Process for Overcoming Anxiety, OCD and Depression.
This video builds upon video thirty-one about using trust and a solid decision-making process as an antidote to the doubt anxiety creates in our minds.
I think it may be prudent to review the last fifteen minutes of video thirty-one again to ensure you get the most from this video.
I have also chosen to split this video into two parts because we’ll be going into quite a lot of detail, and I don’t want you to rush this work; I’d like you to take your time as you consider what I am saying and how it may apply to you.
In part one of this video, we will explore what death might mean to you – because this perspective will form the foundation of your new decision-making process, which will be detailed in part two.
So, let’s ease ourselves into this exploration of death by asking one profound question – “What do you think happens when you die?”
In later videos, I’ll explore coming to terms with death, strategies for grieving – and meditations that allow us to live our lives now whilst accepting death is inevitable – rather than not living our fullest lives due to fear and worry.
I know this subject may trigger some of you, especially those with health anxiety or good old fashioned hypochondria as it used to be called – but stay with me… You sitting with that discomfort (rather than sabotaging yourself through distraction or stopping the video) is the exposure training we have talked about so many times.
So, back to my question, “What do you think happens when you die?”
As I have said in other videos, there were times in my early life when I was religious and thought God was judging everything I did, times when I was an atheist, a spell being agnostic. Then (only in my 50’s), developing a belief in a higher order after some remarkable (and inexplicable) experiences, which I would call spiritual.
I believe the Universe has intelligence which some may label as God – or the description that works for me is – the Godliverse.
Now, I need to make one point very clear – I am not trying to convert your faith in any way; I fully respect your beliefs in any direction, and of any religion, or not!
I don’t know what will happen when we die; I just have my own experiences to go on – which I plan to share with you in later videos.
However, I will be referencing my own beliefs to explain how I see the world – but you must explore what works for you…
I am just asking YOU to ask yourself, “What do YOU think happens when YOU die?”
And even if you don’t know – and none of us can be 100% sure – how might you choose a single perspective that will form the basis of how you choose to see life now – and therefore will form the perspective you decide to operate and make decisions from.
If you were to say, “I think nothing happens after death, but I hope there is something…” This flip/flopping duality is what we are looking to avoid – because your ego-mind is hedging its bets and looking to cover both bases!
I am asking you to pick a single option – either it ends with death or a new journey starts with death – which one will you choose?
Now, I know it’s a minefield talking about death, religion and faith – but it is a conversation we shouldn’t ignore, so bear with me as I try my best.
I am very aware there are many flaws in my arguments, and I may have missed some perspectives, but I am trying to open your mind to all the options I see available – as you answer that one question – from one single perspective.
“What do YOU think happens when YOU die?”
And, of course, you can always change your perspective in the future – I have,
many times.
So, let’s explore how (what you think happens to you when you die) may affect how you live your life now – and the decisions you make that will influence the outcomes of your life.
In its simplest form – is this life one life, a brief flash in the pan, then game over, we fade to darkness, gone forever?
Or, does a formless (perhaps energetic) aspect of us live on in some way after death? The rider lives on, though the horse has expired.
So, let’s begin by exploring the concept that all we have is this one life – sandwiched between nothing and infinite emptiness.
If this is your belief, perhaps the next choice that arises might be… Is it of significance to you whether or not this single life has meaning or purpose?
As you can see, to my mind, this brings up three possibilities – firstly, you might declare the fact that meaning and purpose is not important to you – or perhaps you desire to create meaning through what you do with your life – or possibly you may wish to acquire meaning through who you become.
Remember, there are no right or wrong choices – I am just offering you as many perspectives as possible to open your mind to all options, and I am asking you to consider the path you wish to follow.
So, if meaning and purpose are not important to you, I think the first headline to consider is… Through that very statement, “my life has no meaning,” you
have instantly decreased your requirement to take responsibility for anybody (or anything) other than yourself!
Then from this self-centred positionality – you can choose to live passively, live actively, let others define your meaning or extinguish your life.
So, let’s briefly examine each of these options to see what they might look like?
To live passively infers that you choose to do nothing or play computer games, stay at home or passively do whatever you want. As life has no meaning, it’s yours to squander.
So, if that is your choice, own it – don’t feel bad about laying in bed all day or staying up late watching films – enjoy it and stop feeling guilty – as this is now your conscious choice of how you wish to live your life!
Gladly accept support from the state, parents and friends and consciously drop all feelings of guilt – enjoy your choice to live passively and with limited responsibility – be happy that others are taking responsibility for you – because you have chosen not to.
Alternatively, you may wish to live actively and with limited responsibility and meaning. Therefore, rules are there to be broken, you can say and do as you wish, and nothing is off-limits because life has no meaning; it’s yours to do as you wish.
Another perspective might be to let others define the meaning of your life.
Which simply stated means to do what your family and culture wish for you or have programmed into you.
Go to school, get a job, get married, have children, pay taxes, retire and expire.
Once again, there is nothing wrong with his model – but it is wise to acknowledge within yourself that this is your choice, and as such, you can drop any feelings of guilt or responsibility that you ought to be doing anything else.
Then finally, in this ‘life has no meaning’ section, there is always the option to end your own life. But as someone who has experienced relatives taking their
own lives and worked for five years at a suicide charity, I would suggest that you have the decency to explain to family and friends beforehand why you have made that decision.
The courage to have that vulnerable conversation often opens the door to higher self-awareness and positive action that might surprise you.
One more thing to consider is… By your indifference for life, could you be, perhaps, engaged in an unconscious and slow passive suicide – through overeating, alcohol consumption, lack of physical exercise and the long term effects of medication and negative thinking on your biology?
Remember, the body reacts to what you hold in mind, which is why, all through this course, I have been encouraging you to become more optimistic and loving within your conscious inner dialogue – regardless of what unrequested thoughts your unconscious mind keeps offering you.
Next up is the consideration that there is only one life – but I would like meaning in my life through what I do (my actions in this life).
And I think your options here span – getting meaning from your work, be that from working for others or yourself. As I’ve said before, do you have a job, a career or a vocation – as this will define your boundaries of effort and responsibility – and can you gain meaning through a job well done rather than the outcomes of your actions?
For example, I only release these videos when I believe I have done a good job, but that doesn’t mean everybody will like them.
Or perhaps, your meaning will come through your family? Providing for, nurturing and supporting them as I outlined with my REPLICATOR model in video 29.
Perhaps, your life will have meaning by sampling life in all its many facets. By becoming a free spirit, off travelling, having adventures, just responding to what life presents you with or working on charity projects?
Or will you get meaning through serving your community – or through hobbies, your social life – or whatever is important to you?
Then, another option for this one life – is to consider, do you wish to gain meaning through who you become?
This is perhaps the most challenging path, but possibly the most rewarding – as who you become is an inside job, and decision-making becomes quite simple as you know who you are and what you are prepared to do (or not!)
Of course, you may have other important perspectives – I am just inviting you to think with different attitudes as we design this first stage of a comprehensive decision-making framework for your life.
Now, on the other hand, what if, when your mortal physical life ends (the horsey expires and the self with a small s, the ego fades away), releasing the rider, the observer, the immortal, formless aspect of you (the Self with a big S) to return home to the source of all creation ready for its next adventure on its path of learning and maturing to become all it can be?
We came here once, so why not a second or third time?
Now, should this be your chosen perspective to live life from – how might that affect how you live life and make decisions now?
As far as my imagination goes, I think this option falls into two main options.
Either, the Universe has intelligence, but it is unknowable and outside of man’s concept of theology.
Or, the more conventional religious concepts of a Soul as an extension of God within you – or whatever your beliefs are.
As I said earlier, I am not trying to sell you anything here – I am just inviting you to consider what you believe and how that conviction may free you from the doubt and indecision that anxiety seems to torment us with.
So, let’s start by looking at a simplistic model that says that the observer or conscious awareness survives death and goes back into the collective consciousness of the Universe.
My first consideration for you is… Does my rider and horse metaphor from video 13 work for you?
Can you keep practising living your life from the observer perspective? The rider watching the horses thoughts? The rider making decisions even if the horse is scared and unsure?
Or, do you need to invent a metaphor that will work for you? One of my friends says that her observer, her conscious awareness, is Universal intelligence within her body. She trusts that ineffable knowledge and maturity over and above her conditioned body’s thoughts and responses. That’s her story; what might work for you?
My second consideration is… How might you choose to perceive the intelligent Universe to be?
I wish to believe it to be benevolent (or indifferent), responding to how I think and behave. It gives me what I need in line with my intentions or what challenges I (unknowingly) require that will force me to grow or let go of conditioned concepts and behaviours.
Or, perhaps you see the Universe as judgemental, and you will be punished or rewarded upon death by your actions in this lifetime?
Or, perhaps, you see this life as purgatorial (in real-time), meaning, rather than waiting for death before the Universe may judge us – it is us who chooses heaven or hell right now by our momentary thoughts, actions and experiences?
I like the idea of a combination of the Universe being benevolent and non- judgemental. We are (in each moment) living our heaven or hell by our perspectives, inner dialogue, actions or inactions!
So then, a big question arises – ‘How might thinking death is not the end affect our courage to make big changes in this life now?’
As before, the sub-categories split into whether having meaning in your life is important to you – and if you are OK with no meaning, the options are as before to live passively, actively, let others define your meaning or exit life.
But I would like to bring in a couple more perspectives; firstly, should you choose to take your own life – might there be karmic ramifications?
In Buddhist teachings, they say – “By committing suicide, you destroy the possibility you have, in this life, of realising the potential for transformation that you have within you. You succumb to an intense attack of discouragement, which is a weakness, a form of laziness. By saying to yourself, ‘What’s the point in living?’ you deprive yourself of the inner transformation that would have been possible. To overcome an obstacle is to transform it into an aid to your progress. People who’ve overcome a major trial in their lives often draw from it a teaching and a powerful inspiration on the spiritual path. Suicide solves nothing at all; it only shifts the problem to another state of consciousness.”
I like that description.
The second notion to consider is. If you live a life with limited meaning and minimal growth, will your next lifetime begin where this lifetime left off?
That’s why I like the Dr David R Hawkins map of consciousness and energy levels – where he advises that we reincarnate in a new body at the same level of consciousness we left the last body.
So, each time we are fortunate enough to be in the rare and precious human form – we must remind ourselves the path is long and time is short. How can we use this time wisely and our challenges sensibly to rise above the mind’s fear and the bodies anxiety?
And should we choose to live this life with meaning – the options are as I mentioned before – only this time could it be achieved without fearing death and believing that some Universal connection supports and guides you?
Then, in our final section, I’ll discuss conventional religion and the model I use for myself, the Earth school model.
Starting with your religion or faith – some good questions to ask yourself are – Is it serving me well? Does it free me or bind me? Am I acting out of fear or love?
And if your answer is yes and your life is going well, I would suggest you use that religion to base your decision-making criteria upon.
However, if it is not serving you well for some reason, three options spring to my mind.
Are you serving your religion well? Are you following the religion because you feel you ought to or because you want to?
Secondly, could you apply (or interpret) your religion differently?
For example, a friend of mine who had a very religiously programmed childhood told me, “Even if God is judging me, I won’t judge myself. And if I am going to be punished on judgement day – until then, I am going to be happy. I’m sure God doesn’t want me to be miserable, and if I am a good person, surely what is there to worry about?”
Or perhaps you could explore a different religion or a more spiritual path?
Then, an often unasked question is; was this religion I follow my choice or was it handed down to me or culturally programmed into me?
If you answer yes to that question – you are back into the ‘is it serving me well’ loop.
If your answer is no, that religion was not my choice – you are likely to be strongly influenced by your family or culture. And in those situations (if the religion is not serving you well), your options are back to the main three I have proposed throughout this course.
Accept what is, or change yourself (or the other) but know that changing yourself will be easier – or to move away from the family or cultural environment to a place where you can explore your own beliefs or interpretation of your given religion.
Then finally, we come to the Earth School model, which I use. However, I am not saying this is true; how could I know? But it works as a model that inspires me and gives me the confidence I need to face life head-on and still be optimistic and overcome any challenges that come my way.
The model proposes that when our high frequency, higher plane Soul comes down to the lower frequency plane of matter and enters the human body – it is ideally placed to experience pain, rejection, hate and fear – emotions that can only be experienced from the human mind and body.
This gives our Soul the perfect environment to grow, learning how to tame the horse, teach it courage and self-esteem and show it how to rise above fear and negativity.
At the same time, our Soul can experience the incredible creativity the human mind and body have to deliver through art, music, writing, construction, woodworking, making communities, helping others and learning the art of unconditional love.
It seems to me there are two main ways to go about growing yourself in Earth school though they are interchangeable.
The first is to focus on yourself, much as a monk might do by dedicating his life to prayer or silent contemplation.
Or through selfless charity – the few people I know who dedicate their lives to helping others always say the same things to me – they say they do it because they want to, that it’s actually them being quite selfish helping others, as it makes them feel good – and that regardless of their outcomes – at least they knew they had tried.
Focussing on yourself can also speed up your advancement through the levels of consciousness, which pull you up to higher energy fields that raise the energy levels of the whole planet. So, indirectly everybody gains from your dedication to your own growth.
Equally, you may choose to be of value to others in this lifetime through your family, work, community or creativity – or whatever works for you?
Then finally, consider that everything you do in this lifetime, every hurdle you overcome, every limitation you transcend, every fear you conquer is in preparation for your next reincarnation – until you have learned enough from
Earth school to be of significant value to the Universe in the higher frequency planes as guardians and teachers of life and knowledge.
OK then – I know for some of you that might be a lot to take in and for others a pretty basic explanation – however, I am asking you to ask yourself, “What do you think happens when you die?” And, “Do I want meaning in my life?” And if so, where?
For now, don’t worry about how you might do this – just choose the concept you feel best aligned with – as this will become the foundation for your new decision-making process that will be expanded upon in the second part of this video.
I will make a pdf of the map used here available for download in the notes below, along with a document to capture your thoughts and intentions.
And because topics like this can be very emotionally charged, I would suggest that if you get triggered, step into the meditation I described in video 15, part two – where we separate the emotion from the story and allow those past stuck emotions to be able to rise up and out of you.
Finally, remember a belief system doesn’t need to be accurate or true; they just need to serve you well.
For example, I believe I am a good teacher, but that’s not necessarily the truth. However, it serves me well as it allows me to put my content out into the world in these videos rather than doubting myself, which would likely lead to procrastination and my becoming unproductive.
As we proceed, this next phase of the course involves a serious investigation of who we currently are and who we wish to become.
Your little eight-year-old is probably going to kick and scream and sabotage you like crazy into not doing the work. Just smile and love it, as you, the rider, rise above those old stories based in fear and set a new course of action for your horsey for the next phase of your life.
I will leave you with a famous and much-used quote from Marianne Williamson…
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frighten us.
We ask ourselves, ‘Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?’ Actually, who are you not to be?
You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you.
We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone.
And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”
Thanks for watching, and I’ll see you all in the following video – so let’s get deciding who we want to become!

Understanding death & living
Video 32 part 1 - exploring what happens at death on options for living